The law of attraction is a wonderful thing once you get your head around it. Being brought up in such a negative environment, living with my Narcissist mother; it was always quite hard to see the positive in any situation. However the longer I went without interaction with my mother, the easier it became for me to remain a positive person. Don’t get me wrong; we all have our bad days where we feel like the world is going to end. How you deal with those bad days is what’s most important though; and is something I feel has truly guided me in life.
The last few months had been a really weird time for me, I felt like I was falling back into a mind-set I used to adapt when my mother was in my life. I needed to re-align my positivity; so, I took a step back just to allow some “me time” to help me find solidarity again. During my cocooning, as I like to call it; I started to really evaluate everything around me. From my working situation, to my life goals, I even evaluated the people in my life. I often find my environment massively affects my way of thinking; so, this was definitely an assessment I needed to do on my life.
I started with my job. My current situation had become an extremely toxic environment. It was consuming all my energy, I was literally drained as soon as I woke up in the mornings. I searched and searched for a new job. I downloaded the audiobook of The Secret; which I highly recommend if you are unsure how to adapt your way of thinking, I listened to this on repeat everyday whilst at my desk. I blocked out all the negativity- If I had to be included in it, I would try and turn it around and rather than get myself to believe it would get better; I told myself every day that it didn’t matter how bad it was, because I wasn’t going to be there for long.
It wasn’t working though; I was still blocking the positivity from coming through. So this is when I started looking at the people around me. I pretty much went AWOL from everyone. I needed to focus on me and only me. I am a sucker for making someone else’s problems my problems. Now it was time to say “Sorry you are going through that, I hope YOU figure it out”. It may sound selfish and I most definitely annoyed a lot of people in this time. However, if these people were to bring the positive energy I required to my life, they would understand and give me my space. If they didn’t- then I began to ask myself what value they were actually bringing to my life and if it was wise to keep them around.
Saying this makes me sound like a terrible person, but honestly, I’m months away from turning 30, I’ve spent my whole life putting other people’s feelings first, It was time to stop. So as harsh as it may sound, “If you ain’t feeding my soul, then you gotta go”
So, all negativity aside I was finally able to focus solely on my first mission; to find a new job. I started listening to sleep meditations on YouTube while I slept. Within a week, I had found the perfect role, interviewed for it AND got offered the job! Some might say its coincidence, but I honestly believe it was the law of attraction. I mean I even wrote my resignation letter before I had found out I had the job. I believed it would happen and it did.
Being no contact with my mother for 3 years now, I knew the pros of cutting certain people off. It also meant I could cut anyone out. If I can do it with the person that gave me life, what makes people think I won’t do it with them? If anyone came to me on a downer, it was bye bye. Now, I’m not heartless, people do have bad days! We all do. However, sometimes people like to hold on to those bad days. Some people feed off the drama and don’t really want to let go of it. These are the people that had to go. I have no time for people that want to dwell in the past and not learn and grow from it. So, these people just got blocked. Like a real life detox; I felt like a new woman!
It’s so important to take some time out to just do you; I think it’s easier for me to say cause I’m a massive introvert, so I love my alone time. Yet, in a world as busy and crazy as the one we live in; you need to look after you! Turn your phone off, meditate, recharge your batteries. Whatever works for you.
2017 was a very… interesting year. I don’t want to dwell on it though. I want to take every hurdle that tried to break me and learn from them. After talking with a fellow blogger The Life of Joy today about the lessons we have learnt this year, I realised how important it is to grow from the downfalls in life. If you don’t you will get consumed in a ball of negativity and it will start to affect every aspect of your life. Hey, for some, you may not mind it or believe it. Me, I just want to get the best I can out of life. I wasted more than half of my lifetime letting my suffering consume me. Not anymore. I want to surround myself with people who have similar mind sets. 2018, I am ready for you. I KNOW this is going to be the best year yet….